Rare

The first time I ever heard of someone eating raw hamburger meat was in Hs. My senior Latin class was on the brink of insanity as we followed our mid-life crisis-ing teacher through hedgehog drills, space balls fests and my personal favorite, the water drinking contests, she inevitably ended up puking. It was in this setting that Billy revealed his deep dark secret. He and his daddy made bite size balls of raw hamburger meat, rolled them in garlic-salt and snacked on them during football. Disgusting but typical of a small town country boy under family influence. Needless to say I didn't think anyone else practiced this but I happened to meet what must have been one of Billy's rare/extra-rare relatives on top of a beautiful mountain in aspen. As a preface, burgers should not fall apart in your hands because they are raw. That's disgusting and the last thing I expected to see after I had carefully put away my snow gear, changed into warm slippers and was ushered through a 'fabulous' dining room to a seat with a 'fantastic' mountain view. The view was what saved me between Julia's extra-rare burger across from me and the extra-rare tuna on my left. I tried to suppress the horrified look on my face and the bile rising in my throat when she ordered but I couldn't quite cover it and had to have a hasty abet dainty sip of 'village' water. Amazing water. I personally feel that the quality of the water is in direct correlation to the quality of the people who make their vacation homes there. Somehow nature knows that the highest and brightest deserve Anyway, enough of that... To all Billy's relations, mad props to your brave death defy tummies, may you live long and eat many lbs of raw burgers.